After burning out for the 2nd or 3rd time within a fairly short period of time, I realized that I was repeating the same cycle of patterns which continued to achieve the same results repeatedly.
Eventually I become exhausted: Physically, Emotionally, and Mentally; due to working overtime to remain in high gear through every stage without slowing down or taking rest in a way that actually recharges and replenishes me. And yes you guessed it:
C O M P L E T E B U R N O U T !
Once this pattern became apparent to me, I decided that I needed to dramatically change my approach and stop trying to be a genius about everything, and spend my time narrowing down the things that I could decide once about and automate to create more time for the things that genuinely bring me joy. (This idea also came from a book I listened to that you should dive in to as well; called The Lazy Genius Way)
Another pattern I noticed was that, the very things that spark genuine joy would get put off or put down once things were in high gear so that I could attempt to keep up. I realized the exact way this contributed to burnout; I would start to feel less & less accomplished and productive because I was no longer doing what I originally set out to do.
During this last time of reflection after burn out I noticed there was so much more that was blocking my ability to make radical change. I was still carrying guilt for wanting to stop and take a moment to care for myself; because everyone and everything needed so much of/from me; and that is where I found my breakthrough.
"I was still carrying guilt for wanting to stop and take a moment to care for myself because everyone and everything needed so much of/from me; and that is where I found my breakthrough."
So let's get into it….
What You Can Do To Avoid Burnout:
SET RELENTLESS BOUNDARIES
The point is to have measures in place that stop your cup from depleting so that you are not giving to anyone or anything from a place of deficit. Figure out what keeps you full and depend on YOU to provide yourself with it. That way anything additional is just that: A genuine add. And that's the place you should make a habit of giving from. Not your reserves.
TAKE REST [SERIOUSLY]
Real rest has to be a part of your routine. If you don’t have a contingency plan for how to cope, navigate, and process inevitable/unforeseen changes in a way that actually works for your emotions, your mental state, your expression type then you are leaving too much room to operate in a chronically reactive state. Be proactive and set routine rest in place for yourself.
STOP & TAKE A MOMENT TO FEEL YOUR FEELINGS
Yes. You are allowed to feel how you feel. Our feelings can tell us quite a bit when we choose to compare them with the facts. If not you will ride your feelings into an imaginary world of oblivion and be in a constant loop of bullshit that isn't even close to reality. Feel your feelings and then add fact to the mix. You can feel your feelings but you don't have to believe all of them. #wisdom&balance
The mind is a beautiful and powerful entity , It is central to everything you’re feeling and tells the body how to respond. You must take the time to organize your thoughts in a quiet place so that your perspective remains intact. Or you will be all over the place mentally, emotionally, spiritually or even physically.
FAN YOUR OWN FLAME
Where a lot of us fail is, we take the time to rest but we do not balance it out with recharging. Both are important. Imagine putting your phone down at the end of the night. The screen is in sleep mode but how long will that battery last without a charge? Do what genuinely makes you light up and feel amazing. Balance your rest routine out with recharging activities. Time with friends/family, creating or expressing yourself. The options are endless. Just Do It.
"The bottom line is, most of us have a terrible habit of remembering everyone and everything else but ourselves."
You can not pour/give from an empty cup; but as parents we find a way to pull from reserves when it comes to patience, attention and everything else in between which leaves us a little more empty than others.
Where did we get the idea that we don't need that same grace, patience and attention?
It's ok to give that to yourself without feeling guilty.
Be intentional & mindful
Be selfish with yourself, Your time & Your energy
Keep your flame lit & avoid having to reignite it!
Be Inspired, Be F.A.B.ulous, Be YOU,